Saturday, 25 September 2010

Feel the vibe..

Hey check out the signature on my head..

That is the workings of my CI surgeon. No more hearing aid for me in that ear, I am now part of the ever growing CI brotherhood and Jelly tot brigade.

I must have made an impression on the NHS, because they gave me a 5 star stay at a private hospital. With my own room along with all mod cons, Lenny Henry would have gone green with envy. They wasted no time working on me at all. My room was a hive of activity, nurses and surgeon all coming in to see the man who wanted to be the next Buzz Light year.

Staff nurse kept me on my toes, asking me all sorts of questions. From dentures to loose teeth, I had to do a double take and tell her that it’s my ear I wanted doing, not my mouth,.. just procedure she replied.

I was then asked to put on the dress and kinky socks. The problem with this dress is that every time you have a call of nature, you have to lift the dress up and sit like a girl would do, so that is sex discrimination if you ask me.

Sister nurse came in and said that I will going in the next thirty minutes. All kinds went through my mind then. I started pacing the room and getting hyped up to the tune of Rocky playing in my head. I did some ghost boxing and with that dress on, sure must have looked funny as hell.

Then the call comes, time to get into bed and let them wheel me down to theatre. Two guys hooked me up to a machine that had a huge syringe. A guy started pressing some buttons and the machine fired up. At this point one guy looked at me and said 'you Ok'? I felt my vision bounce, I knew what was coming so.. I just closed my eyes and went to sleep with a smile on my face.

Two hours later I am woken up to the sight of two nurses fussing over me. A huge bandage on my head and hey presto it’s been done!

Surgeon sees me and says the op was a success with full insertion of electrodes.

I looked at him and smiled.

Ain't life beautiful?


  1. Thats a belter my man, nice one! Sounds like your wee trip to hospital wasnt to bad after all. Its amazing how its all panic before and then you wake up, bang, done, off you go home! Phew, well you in the club now. Chill and in no time at all you will be hearing so much more clearly than you could ever imagine. Hard work but worth every minute of being able to communicate with people. :)

  2. It's amazingly quick, isn't it? Those surgeons do an incredible job.

  3. Good news Clive. Look forward to seeing you thrive with the new bionic ear.

  4. Wow. First class treatment and a first class scar! Give it time to heal and you can have some fun sticking magnets to you head!! Fridge magnets can be a blast! Glad all went well and let us know when the switch on is.

  5. Yeah thanks folks. Will definitely be trying fridge magnets

  6. Hey Clive, it's your surgery-twin from across the pond. I hear you had a smooth sail. Your scar points a very different direction than mine, though. Glad you're doing well. :)

  7. Hi Kieron, How you doing? Got the jack hammer thing going on?

    The old brain has now sussed that something is amiss and is giving me grief.

  8. Hi Clive, Jonny (your nephew, my son) gave me the link. So glad you have had the surgery and are up and about. he says you get to try it out in a months time so happy healing and fingers crossed
    love Sarah

  9. Hi Sarah, fancy seeing you here of all places. lol

    Thanks for your well wishes and hope you're enjoying America!

    All the best.


  10. well its just like when you were living with us and going to collingwood, just cause you couldn't see me didn't mean i didn't know what you were up to LOL